Fifteen years ago today I lost someone who was very special to me; she was my mother and she was as sweet as a Cherry on a tree. Normally around the anniversary of her death, I get sad, although I miss her all the time.

Throughout the following 5 years after her death, I searched for instant satisfaction to fill the void, yet nothing materialist satisfied me. No matter how many clothes, shoes, cars, or furniture I purchased I was still searching, but was unaware of what I was searching for. Eventually, drugs and alcohol became my artificial friends.

Meanwhile, I would hear my mom’s voice saying to me as she had always said “Dear, whatever you do, be the best that you can be, and always look up to where your help comes from.” I knew I could do better, but I could not; I was only living on the surface. My spirit was willing, but my body was weak (Matt: 26:41, NRSV). So I asked God for help.

In fact, God did for me what I could not do for my self. I just needed to ask for help and to trust that there was a power greater than myself who could help. “Be on guard so that your hearts are not weighed down with dissipation and drunkenness and the worries of this life, and that day does not catch you unexpectedly, like a trap. For it will come upon all who live on the face of the whole earth. Be alert at all times, praying that you may have the strength to escape all these things that will take place, and to stand before the Son of Man” (Luke 21:34-36, NRSV).

Therefore, I will rejoice in the Lord and thank him for the remembrance of my mother. “Beloved, I do not consider that I have made it my own; but this one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the heavenly call of God in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 3:13-14, NRSV).

I was certain that I could not survive without my mother. What I have learned is that she is always with me. What a blessings to cherish her memories.

I would love to hear how you survived a loss.