Today I am grateful that I gave birth to a daughter in the year that she was born 53 years ago; I seem ancient.

I am sad because my sister died, and that’s how she wanted it because she refused to get any help; I feel so powerless because I was and am.

I feel mad because I have COVID and was more cautious than most, yet I feel sorry for myself.

My nerves are like fire, and I know what to do is rest. When my oldest sister died, I drank myself to oblivion while wailing in the bar. I am grateful to utilize my tools today and write how I feel instead of drinking and drugging, thinking I will change my feelings.

No, feelings are not facts; they are emotions I can feel because of recovery.

I am grateful for a higher power that I can lean on. I have an additional layer since I added a call to prayer to my phone as a reminder to stop, breathe, and be intentional when asking for help. My spirituality is a collective of sources that comfort me, and I am so grateful for my intentions.

My spouse has COVID, too; we are alive, not dead. So many people didn’t make it, so thank you, my giant spirits, that continue to help me along the way. I could go on and on because I have so much to say, but I will stop here and know this shall pass along the way.