Last week we discussed the importance of self-care. So let us continue in that mindset and focus on how to make a wrong into a right. Besides, by taking care of others we reap the benefits, as well.
In hindsight, I can recall times when I was selfish; thinking about no one, but Lynda. I felt justified in my actions because either I was afraid that I would not get what I wanted, or I would lose what I had. When in fact, if I was winning, then that meant someone was losing. As a result, my stubborn behavior caused me to take a serious look at how my approach affected others.
So, if we are willing to go to any lengths to get healthy, then we have to be willing to clean-up our past. Sure, no one wants to look at their wreckage, let alone make restitution for harm done to another. But, our lives are depended upon us getting well, otherwise we will remain sick in our disease.
“…when a man or a woman wrongs another, breaking faith with the Lord, that person incurs guilt and shall confess the sin that has been committed. The person shall make full restitution for the wrong, adding one-fifth to it, and giving it to the one who was wronged” (Numbers 5:5-7).
Actually, if this suggestion appears overwhelming because perhaps we have left a negative impact on so many people, then let us take this in piecemeal. First, let us make a list of persons we have injured, and if we are honest we will know who those persons are. In the first column write the names of those persons whom we are willing to make immediate amends. Then in the next column let us write persons whom we cannot make amends to right away for whatever reason, but we might be able to make amends later. Next, in the third column list persons whom we will never make amends to, because we still believe they are the ones who are in the wrong.
Moreover, once we start this simple process, but not necessarily easy, we will suddenly realize that we do not only have a desire to complete the first column, but we will want to move forward to the next column, and so forth. Keep in mind, that persons do not want to hear our tales again, but they want to see our actions. Meanwhile, while I know this to be true, we have to trust the process. To emphasize, what I have learned is that God will do for us what we cannot do for ourselves. We only have to be willing to do what is right.
As a result, we can find joy in cleaning up the debris of our past. We do not have to shut the door on our faults, but we can help another in our sharing. We definitely will know a new freedom and a new happiness.
Are you willing to make your list today in order to start the recovery process?